Friday, October 16, 2009

Breaking The News (Emotional Aspects cont.)

As I discussed in a previous post, there are many emotional aspects to making such a life changing decision. One of my biggest points of anxiety, so far, has been how to ‘break the news’ to our immediate family. Until a few weeks ago, our decision to go full-time existed only between us. We talked about it extensively, but had not told anyone else (with the exception of joining the RV-Dreams forum and we didn’t yet know any of those people personally!). But by keeping it secret, it didn’t feel real. So we tested the waters by telling a few friends. This felt pretty safe because we were fairly certain we would receive positive responses. Then we attended the RV Dreams rally (see my previous post) where we knew we would have the utmost support. That really catapulted our dream into reality, so now it is time to start sharing our plans with our loved ones and I am nervous about the reactions we will receive.

I don’t know why this feels so hard. After all, what is the worst that could happen? Will I be told that I am foolish? Probably. Will they be disappointed? Maybe. Will they disown me? Doubtful. Will they support our decision? I don’t know, but hopefully they will eventually come to accept it. Will they still love us? Yes.

Part of me feels like a child again…seeking approval and not wanting to disappoint. But we left childhood long ago and have been making our own decisions for many years now. So why should it really matter? After all we’re not asking for approval. We would very much like to have support and understanding, but even if we don’t get that, we’ll still move forward with our plans. I’m sure I’ve made other decisions that resulted in disappointment and I’ve certainly made my share of mistakes, but isn’t that just part of life?

I appreciate that most reactions will stem primarily out of concern for our well-being. I know our families don’t want to see us make a mistake which will result in our suffering. Although we don’t think this is a mistake, I can understand how some may disagree. I also accept that it may be difficult for some to ever be comfortable with the idea of such an uncommon lifestyle. It certainly isn’t right for everyone. But we’re not asking anyone else to live this lifestyle. We believe that it is right for us and we’re the ones willing to give it a shot.

But all of this rationalizing doesn’t alleviate the anxiety. Sometimes I wonder if I’m making more of this than there really needs to be. That sure would be nice. Either way, I know the time has come to “bite the bullet”. And I hope this blog will help in the aftermath. Providing a resource for those who are struggling with our decision was one of the main reasons I decided to start a blog. I often find it easier to share my thoughts and feelings in writing and I hope that some of what I write makes sense to others. And even if it doesn’t, it’s been good for me!

So here it goes. Wish us luck!

5 comments:

  1. I appreciate your apprehension about telling your family. We felt the same and when it finally became a reality, our daughter gave us a boatload of grief. We were selling the family home, we would be far away a great deal of the time, we were spending money on a motorhome that would depreciate instead in appreciate, etc etc. Well as it turned out after a year or so, she became our biggest supporter. We could go to her place and spend some real quality time for several weeks at a time and she saw how happy we were to be traveling and doing all the fun things we had only heard about before. So even if they put up a fight at first, they will come around. I'm talking about our grown kids. My hubby's siblings were convinced we had totally lost our mind and I'm not sure they ever decided different. You have to do what makes you happy, not what makes everyone else happy. Even if they aren't overjoyed, they will come around at some point.

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  2. we are exactly in the same decision/facilitating place that you are both in. As each day goes by, I am fully convinced that this needs to happen. The best of luck to you and we will be following your blog! Kim and Don

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  3. Well very interesting. I wish I could go along with you. I think you two are so lucky to be able to do this. I hope you have a great adventure and you know I will be following your story closely. I love you both. Good luck.
    Dani

    PS-Trace was that clean enough for you? :)

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  4. I love you guys and couldn't be more happier to hear the FANTASTIC news. Your blog is very inspirational!!!! Can't wait to read more!

    P.S. We would be more than willing to take any household items off your hands. Hehe.

    Love You Guys!!!!

    ~ Krystal

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  5. I found your blog from KandD. We were in the same boat 4 yrs ago hoping to go full time in 2012. After going to the RV-Dreams rally in 2008 we now have our 5er on order and will leave middle of January. We thank Linda & Howard so much. Don't be afraid what people think, you'll be free to roam and visit anyone anywhere. When we told the family, they ALL loved it. Think of YOURSELVES.

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